No I haven't been counting. Scott told me. This morning when the kids were at art Scott checked his email and received his (our) invite to the "office" or school christmas party. As he read the date he also added that that date was my last day at school. Whoa... That was unexpected. That's the end... practically within reach... that's insane... I'm so not ready to process it so I will live in my delusional land.
I've been trying to get ahead on my philosophy of education paper since it is due right after thanksgiving and I don't want to spend this break working on a paper like the last one. What i've found though is that I'm struggling to write it. Not the actual conventions of the paper but rather how on earth am I supposed to decide what my philosophy or theory on education is. I mean really, I'm 23 and trying to figure out what my philosophy on life is... even my theory on life (for the record though, I never plan to figure those ones out). I don't think I will figure out my philosophy or theory until I'm actually alone in a classroom sitting on the floor in a circle with my first class. As I have found with many of my life experiences I can think one thing, then actually experience whatever it is and realize all my planning will lead to something wonderful I never could have foreseen. Or sometimes it will lead to something that I will recognize I need to change. I'm sure I can declare a theory or philosophy for the sake of paper writing but the truth of the matter is, until I get to set the desks up the way I want and put bright happy colors up because it's my classroom. Who am I to say how I will react year to year to my different students. Who am I to say that every single day I'll come in with a great attitude... Those are unpredictables and things I don't feel comfortable declaring without true solo experience....
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