If I didn't get your attention yet...well, then I failed you!!! So first thing first... I have a hot sub... Trevor is gone with the 5th graders so I got to spend my days with the 3rd and 4th graders. It was totally awesome while absolutely nerve-racking at the same time... I mean I barely know these kids... How will we survive together?? Knowing it was a half day with the kids I tried to be really pumped up for it, but honestly I was a little scared. The day started out great, the 3rd and 4th graders were fun and totally supportive of my nerves. Now we were going around sharing when suddenly... a loud noise happened across the circle and all the kids made a funny face. Body humor will do that to little kids... I mean, sure, body humor is funny and wonderful but its also a part of life and I have little to no tolerance for it. I mean hello, my favorite book is "Everyone poops" so I was trying to get the kids to get over the fart... until I realized that the smell was coming closer and closer to me... Every kid who smelled that particular fart made an AWFUL face and looked genuinely in pain and when the smell finally reached me I realized why. It was the worst smell everrrrrr and I obviously was trying to not laugh and react too but man oh man. It was hilarious, and I worked very hard to bring the kids back to focus without showing my own reaction. The next thing I should really mention was the fact that Trevor's sub, Arthur, who was hot. Yes, I said it, I had a hot sub. It was great. So I left for seminar not 100% faithful in Arthur since it was in fact, his first day subbing, but pretty excited about having a good day with the kids. I mean, really only a few minor bumps, no crazy stories. At seminar we had to give our presentations on our storyboards on play. One group went above and beyond the call of duty and made beer... I wasn't in their presentation group so I don't understand how it exactly mixed in but man, it was a nice little change in our regular seminar routine. However, that little cup of beer somehow led to songs about poop in our final seminar, which was about using music in the classroom. Now, as most of you know, (or at least I hope you know) that I love music and will take any excuse to sing or perform or whatever so I loved this one. We were broken down into smaller groups to write songs and one group wrote a song about constipation to the tune of "Joy to the World"... It was hands down the most AWESOME thing I've encountered and I will now post it for you to enjoy:
My stomach hurts
I have to poop
It's stuck inside my butt
I strained and strained and strained
I almost popped a vein
I pushed witha ll my might
It put up quite a fight
Next time I'll take some laxatives....
Joy to the World
I took a poop
It came out big and bright
It almost filled the bowl
I flushed it down the hole
It swirled and swirled and swirled
It kind of rocked my world
How did I get filled with so much crap
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