Some days are jumbled like puzzles….

And we just have to sort through them until you find the right ones. Once the day got going it was pretty clear it would be a jumbled day. Emily and I were running the little group again out in the mobile for interims. Thankfully (MERCI DIEU) it was our last exams but they definitely saved the hardest for last. Emily and I had to read literally every… single…. instruction and every single answer to the kids… It was brutal beyond brutal… Especially since all the kids were wanting the pace to be different either slower or faster. When the torture was finally over we settled back into our regular pace and schedule of the days. The most interesting part of the day came towards the end when we were working on our poetry section. While I was debriefing with some of the kids (they were given the opportunity to choose their poems) I ran into a wall. Not physically but metaphorically. We have a kid in our class who has severe ADHD and it gets into the giggles or rather the “I’m not going to listen to the teacher and make everyone laughs”. I’ve tried everything… It really frustrates me because I feel like he totally discounts me as a person and an authority figure… So Scott and I decided we would address it with him. So the way it went down was him, Scott and me in the hallway.. Scott then says something along the lines of “ I’ve noticed Ms. Detmer getting a little frustrated with you sometimes and she and I have talked about it and I’d like you to hear her feelings.” Here’s what happened in my brain…: HOLY MOTHER… AHHH I HATE CONFRONTATION….can I smile? Is that ok? BE AN ADULT EMILY BE AN ADULT…. Doug, I have been struggling because I feel as though you don’t listen to me when I talk. Yeah… that sounds good go with that… It really hurts my feelings because I think you’re a wonderful kid and I know we can have fun together but sometimes we need to be serious. (Bold is Scott) Doug, do you feel like you treat Ms. Detmer differently than you treat me? Doug nods his head. WHOA… DID HE JUST ADMIT THAT? MAN… I hope that we can work to make this better in my last few days with you guys. I really enjoy when we work together and I hope you do too. He nods again. Do you think maybe you should say something to Ms. Detmer? Ms. Detmer, I’m sorry. WHOA… WAIT, DID HE JUST SAY THAT? HOLY MACKERAL THIS KID IS SO WITH IT! AHHHH I’M SMILING AGAIN…man I hope that’s ok…. I JUST CAN’T BELIEVE HOW EASY THIS WAS!!!!




Anyways, the next few things are just a tiny selection of the artwork I received today from my kids…. Knowing that I’m going to meet my new mentor and kids tomorrow has really hit these guys hard. A lot of what I’m struggling with now is my feeling of abandonment. I feel as though I am just one more person in their lives who is letting them down… I HATE feeling that way. They do not deserve that at all and I hope and pray they don’t feel abandoned by me…. But I can’t help but wonder… Is this teaching? Is this part of the letting go at the end of the year? Do I have to get used to this feeling?