I know I know...

I haven't posted my final write up from Tollgate but I'm sitting here with Paige and Mara working on our storyboard project and I stumbled upon (no, not procrastination stumble upon...) a series of videos on YouTube that deserves a complete and TOTAL shout out.... We will even be using on in our project just to prove how with it this message is. It is Unicef's project on "Cartoons for Child Rights" it is definitely worth sitting down and taking a minute to recognize that not only are they dead on on of those topics but we as humans need to give EVERY single child those rights....The other thing that I totally loved is that each video is created by a different country so it isn't just Europe or America or China standing up for these rights it is a GLOBAL effort to help make a difference. Global awareness... definitely a right for everyone too

Here's the right to education just to get you started...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e5R4jAxKY-I&feature=relmfu

The Jig is up...

Thanks to one of my funniest and most all over everywhere kids... I know what my surprise is (aka THANK GOD ... I mean tomorrow is going to be hard enough...The last thing I need is for there to be an unknown surprise factor stuck in there)... Now having been gifted with wonderful intuition from my mother I tend to catch on to when something is going on... Sometimes I try to deny it and sometimes I try to figure out whats going on... In terms of my surprise I had decided that I would just... wait and see what it is.. I mean really how harmless can 24 10 year olds and 1 34 year old be... Anyways so this morning after we picked up the kids from music I had to run a quick errand... When I got back into the classroom my ears were peaked (so to speak) but I couldn't figure out why... So we were beginning to set expectations for our greeting when "MR. ALVERSON... What do we do with the letters for Ms. Detmer?"...Class collective AHHHHHHH MARCUSSSSS "Marcus," Scott replied, "I don't know what you're talking about..." Clearly trying to get Marcus to pick up on what was going on... However, being the endearing child that he is... he totally didn't get it. AT ALL. It was pretty cute... But needless to say all the other kids were very very upset and just could NOT handle the fact that he had spoiled my surprise. For the rest of the day he was thoroughly hassled by his crew members for ruining my surprise... He was very upset and even talked to Scott to say if he thought I knew or not. To blanket the concerns of the class I had to make a statement somewhere along the lines of "I can't wait for my surprise tomorrow..."

One down.... 24 to go

... I'll get to that in a minute but first I'd like to address how I know something is up... When I walked into the classroom today I took inventory as I normally do on Friday mornings... On the chart paper I saw that there was a bunch of adjectives like funny, organized, wonderful... well you get the idea... anyways they were written in Scott's handwriting and at the bottom it said "likes pink..."... Hmm... smiling I thought, oh God, they're planning something. Now I HATE surprises so knowing that Scott and the kids are up to something scares me...


Later today was part one of the hardest part of this job. I had to say good bye to one of my kids. One of my girls is going to Mexico for her sister's quinceanera and won't be at school next week. While I expected to be really sad about this and have potential for crying... It didn't. I didn't cry... not even a little bit. While I know that I will miss these kids and Scott so much, I think I'm just ready... When I hugged this girl at the end of the day I was really realizing that this first chapter of my experience is over.... Knowing that I have to turn this leaf over is definitely hard but I'm so looking forward to things like a 6 minute commute.. and challenging myself with a mixed age classroom... And truly, I know that this is just the beginning of another awesome adventure... or maybe its just a continuation of the adventure...

Gasp...

I think it happened. I mean... it really happened... I became ready for break and ready to be in my new environment. I became ready for break when I realized that tomorrow may be the weekend but on Monday, I still have to go to work... It's totally silly and mildly childish but, I really need a break. I need time to catch up on sleep, to really spend some quality time thinking about and working on myself. The other reason I'm ready for break is that everyone else is going on break tomorrow.... Totally silly I know, but I'm definitely feeling "jealous-of-everyone-else's-long-break-itis"... WIth switching districts I lose 5 days of break. 5 days. 5 whole days... That feels like a lot to me, a whole heck of a lot... I know I know, life isn't fair but man oh man... is it wednesday yet?? While I totally hate the idea of leaving the kids... I'm looking forward to the challenges that my new school will pose... They are totally different and I will once again be forced to find myself in a new element...

Today...

So today had some moments of greatness and some moments of not so greatness.... But over all, I'm laying here in bed feeling like it was a pretty successful last wednesday with the kids. My lesson was awesome and it really proved to me how important it is to know your kids and know their limits. I pushed my kids today and they responded with enthusiasm and excitement... Can't ask for anything better than that now can we? I really was proud of how far my lessons have come from the beginning of the year and I think (...maybe?) I am beginning to grasp the important balance between performing for the kids on the fly and having a solid plan behind me to structure the conversation. Balancing being able to change lessons depending how the kids react to keeping with what the lesson says exactly is one of the hardest parts of being a teacher I think, one I hope to adjust everyday for every lesson. Other awesome part of the day? Having awesome thought provoking conversations with my fellow interns... All in unexpected ways but all making me realize how much this group of people impact my life and will continue to for a while... Despite our ideas of different experiences and thinking we know certain things about schools or other classrooms... Until we experience either teaching for real or anything nearly as difficult... The truth of it is.... now this is a big secret so don't share it ok?.... well, teachers (read: EVERYONE) don't know everything... we don't know everything about every subject ( i learned a new word today: lattice), we don't know everything about everyone (I learned that one of my co-interns figured out a cool pattern I never would have seen if not for her eyes and her knowledge) and we don't know everything about ANYTHING.... The great part about living in this day and age is that we are discovering new things all the time... I am preparing my kids for jobs that DO NOT EVEN EXIST YET.... The best part about all of this?.... It's ok. It's ok to not know everything. It's ok to be surprised once in a while and most importantly, it's ok to be who you are. So own what you know and recognize the gaps in your own knowledge... I promise... It's OK

Tuesday...

So today was weird in that a) it was our double science day and b) despite the kids doing exactly what we asked of them... it was just weird... They were sluggish and not interested or disengaged.... It was just like the last few tuesdays have been... weird... They did everything we asked of them, but they just seemed to lose their sparkle... I'm wondering how you can fight that within the kids or keep their level of excitement up... Is it as simple as making them jump up and shake the tired out of their bodies? Or is it that their natural rhythms just all flat lined at the same time...

The children are too sweet.....

(monday btw)

And gave me presents! I felt so loved by them! I got earrings, a necklace, an ornament, a bracelet and a box I was told I can't open until christmas because then it "wouldn't be a christmas present". It's hard not to feel so loved when you receive 3 presents from kids! After getting 2 different sets of cookies on friday... I'm realizing now how hard it really will be to leave my kids.... This beginning of the day really made me realize how little things can really set the tone of your day. I loved the way this day went... Except when I realized that I had 8 days left the kids.... so basically I'm not acknowledging it.

It's fridayyyy fridayyy

When I got to school today I realized that I would have to tell my kids about my "new" kids... Needless to say I did what all good teachers do and distract them! I taught them a new game that I learned at Steele and they're now all OBSESSED! We even taught Lindsay and Emily's class! I mean it definitely wasn't the easiest thing but it worked and I was able to once again post pone "THE talk".... aka explain to my kids that despite their understandings... I really am leaving...

It's a new dawn... It's a new day...

I met my new kids! On Thursday I took the morning off from Tollgate to head over to Steele to meet my new mentor and new kids. Despite my nerves I really enjoyed the day...especially the 8 minute commute! It was definitely different than my 20-25 minute commute out to Aurora. I vaguely remember Steele from when I interviewed with Stanley but this time around I tried to totally commit everything to memory for when I arrive in January. I'm looking forward to next semester for a few reasons, the first being the fact that my classroom has 3 whole windows... WINDOWS... how awesomely novel! We are a north facing classroom so while we won't get direct sunlight for a while, it will still be wonderfully nice to have natural light. In fact, I'm pretty sure we didn't even have the lights on, we just let the natural light illuminate our classroom. The next reason I'm really excited is that I will be in a mixed aged classroom so 3rd, 4th AND 5th graders! I'm looking forward to this so that I will really be able to implement a lot of what we learn at seminar. I definitely felt overwhelmed at moments but I'm sure I will integrate nicely into my new community.

Some days are jumbled like puzzles….

And we just have to sort through them until you find the right ones. Once the day got going it was pretty clear it would be a jumbled day. Emily and I were running the little group again out in the mobile for interims. Thankfully (MERCI DIEU) it was our last exams but they definitely saved the hardest for last. Emily and I had to read literally every… single…. instruction and every single answer to the kids… It was brutal beyond brutal… Especially since all the kids were wanting the pace to be different either slower or faster. When the torture was finally over we settled back into our regular pace and schedule of the days. The most interesting part of the day came towards the end when we were working on our poetry section. While I was debriefing with some of the kids (they were given the opportunity to choose their poems) I ran into a wall. Not physically but metaphorically. We have a kid in our class who has severe ADHD and it gets into the giggles or rather the “I’m not going to listen to the teacher and make everyone laughs”. I’ve tried everything… It really frustrates me because I feel like he totally discounts me as a person and an authority figure… So Scott and I decided we would address it with him. So the way it went down was him, Scott and me in the hallway.. Scott then says something along the lines of “ I’ve noticed Ms. Detmer getting a little frustrated with you sometimes and she and I have talked about it and I’d like you to hear her feelings.” Here’s what happened in my brain…: HOLY MOTHER… AHHH I HATE CONFRONTATION….can I smile? Is that ok? BE AN ADULT EMILY BE AN ADULT…. Doug, I have been struggling because I feel as though you don’t listen to me when I talk. Yeah… that sounds good go with that… It really hurts my feelings because I think you’re a wonderful kid and I know we can have fun together but sometimes we need to be serious. (Bold is Scott) Doug, do you feel like you treat Ms. Detmer differently than you treat me? Doug nods his head. WHOA… DID HE JUST ADMIT THAT? MAN… I hope that we can work to make this better in my last few days with you guys. I really enjoy when we work together and I hope you do too. He nods again. Do you think maybe you should say something to Ms. Detmer? Ms. Detmer, I’m sorry. WHOA… WAIT, DID HE JUST SAY THAT? HOLY MACKERAL THIS KID IS SO WITH IT! AHHHH I’M SMILING AGAIN…man I hope that’s ok…. I JUST CAN’T BELIEVE HOW EASY THIS WAS!!!!




Anyways, the next few things are just a tiny selection of the artwork I received today from my kids…. Knowing that I’m going to meet my new mentor and kids tomorrow has really hit these guys hard. A lot of what I’m struggling with now is my feeling of abandonment. I feel as though I am just one more person in their lives who is letting them down… I HATE feeling that way. They do not deserve that at all and I hope and pray they don’t feel abandoned by me…. But I can’t help but wonder… Is this teaching? Is this part of the letting go at the end of the year? Do I have to get used to this feeling?

I'm going to be totally honest...

I have no idea what happened today... Despite being at school all day, and not feeling blank when I got home to actually write this, it took me a few minutes to remember what exactly occurred. First off, the kids went to specials. Then we did interims again... which felt shocking to me, I can't believe we were already at the point where we need to be assessing them again. Emily and I ran a small group in one of the mobiles which once we got it unlocked ;-) Granted it took for bloody EVER, it definitely felt like a step in the right direction for these kids. They just need a little bit more help which happens sometimes in test taking! From there it was weather journal time and onto lunch! After lunch we did a little independent reading, a little poetry and a little math. I guess that because today was as close to "normal" as possible that's why it seemed to blur. Nothing crazy never really happened which I am grateful for of course....

fridayyyy

now for the record I am writing this retrospectively and may not remember every detail so please forgive me...

Now first I'm going to read your mind: Choose any number... Write it down... I predict it will be 7 ok?

We spent the beginning part of the morning working with our k-garten buddies on presenting for their expedition. It was fun watching the kids teach the little ones how to project their voices, read from their prompts and most importantly, support them! From their we went to science and then back to the classroom for our weather journals/diaries. It was once again hilarious to watch the kids frolic and play (the eskimo way) as they tried to "discover" the weather. From there amazingly it was lunch time...
The kids then got tested for hearing before we transitioned into finish their BBKs (building background knowledge) for the expedition. This BBK included watching videos of eXtreme WEATHER and while I think it ran a little long considering how off track the kids seemed to get, they certainly enjoyed it. The videos were of literally all kinds of extreme weather and I most enjoyed learning about FIRE tornados... which are INSANE and everyone should learn about them!

Now for the mind reading... So I told you to write down a number, and that I predict it will be 7. Are you ready?
Ok take you number... Add 9
Now double your new answer.
Subtract 4.
Now divide by 2.
Subtract your ORIGINAL answer.....


you got 7 didn't you?


HA MATH IS COOOOLLLLL

snow snow snow

but no snow dayyyy... sadly. I totally would have called one, but no one asked me. The snow today was hilarious for me for a few reasons. The first being that this was my first time driving in Colorado snow since buying my car 3 years ago! Mac (the car) and I have mainly spent our winters and "snow" season down South where snow is what we Coloradans call dust. I was pleasantly surprised to find that despite most cars having four wheel drive my commute still took much longer than I anticipated. When I eventually got to school the kids were clearly excited about the prospect of outdoor recess and the chance to play in the snow. Being that it was thursday the kids went to PE then went to science. When we got them back we had to go out and collect our data for our weather journals/diaries for our expedition. The kids LOVED getting to be outside and "observe" the snow... AKA we caught snowflakes on our tongues and checked out the individual flakes... If this is a science expedition, I'm pumped about it!