And sooooo the water works begin...

Today I finally gave in and cried about how much I'm going to miss these kids.... We had the presentation of the Steele Stallion awards and that's when I realized how many of the kids at Steele had touched me... Had made me a better teacher AND person... When my student won for the 5th grade, I definitely had some tears rolling down my face. Mainly because his face when he won was just pure excitement, astonishment and joy all at once. I had a flashback in my head of all my days with the kids of 202... They are all so clear in my mind and I'm just so blessed to have spent the past 4 months with them. All of this got worse when the parents showed up at 2:50 with flowers and a thank you note... I burst into tears and just fought myself to hold it together. I DREAD Thursday/ Friday with the goodbyes to both the interns and the kids... I am not ready for this year to be over in any way.... I need a serious life break because it is going WAYYYYY too fast for me right now. No way am I ready for June... NO NO NO NO NO ....mature I know

When the simplest thing can turn it all around

So I haven't been having the greatest of mid-weeks... I don't want to go into details but let's just say that a lot has been weighing on my mind that isn't school or job search related. After leaving seminar early today and working through some of what has been going on, I headed over to my parents house for a little debrief and hang time. When I got there I had two letters from my sister in law and my soon to be sister in law. One was a thank you note for my baby shower gift and one was an invitation to be a bridesmaid... Let me tell you, I literally burst into tears because I felt so loved by these two women. It was so nice to just have something nice and happy happen. Silly, but sometimes its just a little thing like a kind thank you note that makes it all a little bit better.

BREAKING NEWS.... I'm not perfect!

It's shocking to all of you I know to learn that I am not perfect. It's totally true, and sometimes hard to grasp. I'll explain how it happened today. It was my last observation and I was presenting the book poster project that we are getting started on. As I am presenting it to the class I suddenly read the following phrase, "Quidditch, a scene from Harry Potty" Yes, you read that right, Harry Potty. I think it's because I was thinking about the fact that I needed to go to the bathroom before class and I was quickly scribbling that phrase. And yes, sometimes (or always) I call the bathroom potty in my real life... Oddly not in my teaching life. When I noticed it the kids burst into giggles and I couldn't help but laugh with them... I had honestly missed that error. Needless to say I learned two valuable lessons: 1) I'm not perfect (damn) and 2) DOUBLE CHECK YOUR WORK BEFOR EYOU PRESENT ITTTTTTTTTTT

FYI today is thursday

Sooooooo I'm leaving tomorrow morning for my 5th year high school reunion. Needless to say I'm a bit nervous. This morning I woke up to check in. However, I got a little mixed up... Somehow I thought it was friday... I FREAKED OUT, realizing that it's 5:56AM and my flight is at 6AM. I'm thinking what the hell can I do!?! I call my parents (approximately 5:57 now) and explain that my alarms got mixed up etc etc I missed my flight!!! They're telling me what to do when suddenly, I see my portfolio for Stanley, which was due today, and realize. If I haven't turned that in... There is NO way that it is friday, I look down at my watch to see the TH, tell my parents that I messed up and to go back to bed. It is now 5:59AM, I log into my Southwest App, and at 6:00 I check in for my flight which was the REAL plan all along.... Happy Thursday!

Monday with no Trevor, Signs and Tuesday with no Rocketry

Monday Trevor wasn’t here so it was me, the kids and a sub that had previously gone through the Stanley program. It was actually a calm day, minus a few bumps. It made me realize that I can do this. This crazy teaching thing, I can do it. I honestly don’t have much to report because for the most part it was a good day. In terms of the “signs” portion of this post it has to do with my current life dilemma. You see, the job search road has led me to a fork and for once, I don’t know which way to go. I’ve always had a clear picture of my “next” steps were but I don’t have one for what happens after this year. I want to be a classroom teacher but I haven’t been so successful in that portion of my experience. So do I keep pushing for that want OR do I take the year off to get my sub license, work on my masters and hope? The monkey wrench in all of this is that I have found my dream school… Well, dream almost school. They get their charter from DPS next month. For those of you who don’t know, I am a “feelings” person. I trust my gut feelings, my sudden reactions and that voice in my heart that tells me when something is right or wrong. I know that this school is my school… But I can’t get hired on until 2013. I feel like that this point I need to keep trying for a job, at least for a little while longer and then go to the back up plan… Where is the deadline though? I am not someone who can aimlessly wait for something that defines my life… I can barely handle waiting now… So just for the record, rocketry still has two more weeks. But luckily I got to spend this afternoon with my kids doing academic choice. It was totally novel, totally unreal to spend it with them. I really enjoyed it. The funny thing was though, I'm DYING to know what they did in Rocketry. I have no idea and it's like being in the in crowd but without knowing all the gossip. I guess my lesson learned today was that we can't know everything with our kids. It happens... We can't know everything.

Dear Sara Smith,

Yesterday at school it was the talent show. The reason that this post is dedicated to you is because one group did our favorite dance. The HOEDOWN THROWDOWN. Now for those of you who missed the reign of Princess Miley pre Can't Be Tamed era, this was a hit from her Hannah Montana movie (seen here, http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RlnbmZK7GxU) For Sara and me this dance is special. It holds many memories of late night dance practices (well for Sara, I OBVI nailed it after I saw the movie) and eventual giggles. To watch these two girls who had to have been 7 when the movie came out do the dance it made me realize how transcendent society is. From the 3 girls who sang Adele songs (do they even know what Rolling in the Deep is about?) to the girl who had technical difficulties and had to endure the shame of going away then coming back, I realized how important strong female figures are to young girls. A movie that my 20 year old self enjoyed also affected and entertained 7 year olds enough for them to STILL know the dance 3 years later (I can't judge, I totally do too) shows that the Can't be Tamed stage of Miley's career needs to not be the norm. Girls can't see half naked women and think that's ok. The girl who danced to Just Dance by Lady Gaga probably doesn't know that she danced to a song that touches on drinking. Anyways, that's a thought for another day. Let's just try to keep fame and celebrities sending positive messages to my kids because that's what my kids deserve. If you're still thinking about the HoeDown Throwdown, here is the link to the instructional video that Sara learned from. Miley breaks it down step by step so the next time you're out in a club whip this move out.... It's how I get ALL the boys.... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hj3OqMzNin4

Tuesday from Hell

So yesterday was a really long day. I had a draining day with one particular student. Not only was it grueling and draining but it was also totally nuts. It just felt exhausting and there was no way to make it not exhausting.It's funny though, I think I've gotten to a point where even though it is exhausting, it no longer surprises me about this student. I've come to just accept the fact that he will have a freak out about nothing, he will fake cry, he will kick objects... It's just how he is processing his anger at the world.