Sometimes it's nice without the kids...

I KNOW THAT IS AWFUL TO SAY... But give me a minute to explain. Today was a planning day and after a meeting about some potential changes to our school WE PLAYED WII DANCEEEEEEEEEEE..... As in the 30 teachers from the school JAMMING to WII dance and absolutely getting sweaty and laughing. It was so much fun, I really loved it. There were really only 2 downers. The first being that after 2 days of snowboarding and working out yesterday, my body hurts. But giving that I love dancing and being silly I was obviously ALL over it. The other downer was a comment made by a teacher who I have had little to no interaction with. Our last discussion about the changes potentially occurring was to make the school a "teaching" school and to just get rid of the whole BP/ contemporary thing. This teacher spoke about the fact that she had a student teacher as well but that it wasn't acknowledged in any way. We, Stanley interns, felt bad. I mean I had NO idea that the girl in this teacher's classroom was a student teacher, I thought she was a para. And I KNOW I wasn't the only one who thought that. So it was awkward because we all felt really bad but at the same time the road goes two ways and this girl/ teacher had just gotten annoyed instead of seeing it as an opportunity to make changes.... Anyways so later during the dance party after some of us interns had given up and instead were watching our mentors dance, this teacher made a comment about us "going above and beyond the other interns" and to keep dancing.... It in my mind was not only a rude comment but an unnecessary comment. Part of being a teacher is understanding that everyone works at different paces and those of us who had stopped dancing were either sore (read: ME) or were just enjoying watching our mentors. AND THAT IS OK.. There is nothing wrong with any of that!

Anyways, Trevor and I spent most of the day just hanging out in our classroom grading work, checking in homework and just enjoying ourselves. We went out to lunch which is a rarity for us and just generally had so much fun. As weird as it was, it was oddly calm and just fun. I felt like Trevor and I were able to just hang out and just enjoy each other. He's a really cool guy and I'm glad I get to learn from him. I'm a little nervous to start doing report cards with him but oh well. Every part of this year is learning and I'm trying my best to learn all I can from every situation.

My day with Ms. Gedvilas!

So for switch day numero dos I got to spend the day with my soon to be sister in law Leigh! I must be honest in that going into this Leigh has been what I imagine a really close to perfect teacher is. And part of that is simply my sisterly love for her and the other part of it is because I've often seen the hard work that she puts in. So needless to say I was nervous to be around this perfect idea in my head. It didn't help that I got a little lost on my way to her school. When I got there and settled in, I realized something so cool, that Leigh really is an amazing teacher. Her ability to manage a classroom of 25 some odd little kinder babies truly left me speechless a few times. Since it has been a little while since I spent time with that age group I was honestly intimidated by the kids. However, the wonderful little community that Leigh has created welcomed me with open arms. Leigh is an incredibly thoughtful teacher, from the pictures on the walls of the Alphabet with the kids to the schedule with little moving breaks, she truly has thought of everything. I also loved how many elements of BP were infused into the classroom. I felt at home in B108 despite not having ever (shamefully) been there before. At the end of the day the kids were so cute in asking me to come back and visit again. I desperately wish I could!

One of the many lessons I learned from visiting is that the little mini-communities that teaching creates are fairly similar and that good teachers make good classrooms. I have been fortunate enough to see so many good teachers and Leigh is definitely one of them. Her patience and understanding of her students was so clear. She could tell when they were getting antsy and would simply play a song and have them dance it out. Leigh is truly a gifted and skilled teacher. The students are so luck to have such a thoughtful and caring person leading their little group. I hope that someday I can be as good a teacher as she is.....

Dearest Leigh, thank you thank you thank you again. I am blessed to have you in my life for so many reasons AND because you'll be my go to person next fall when I am alone in the classroom and terrified!

Valentine's day is for teachers... AND teaching...

So yesterday I was really pumped about the big V day despite the single status mainly because I knew the kids would make the day super awesome. AND I WAS RIGHT. The valentines cards made for each other and for the teachers were adorable and awesome and so incredibly sweet. Except when it isn't. One valentine I received really gave me reason to pause. It said, "Ms. Emily, I have never known a teacher to be mean and strict at the same time!" Oh yeah, with the exclamation point and all. Now honestly, I was a little shocked mainly because I'm not mean. Seriously, I could be really mean but I'm really nice to these kids, partially because I still feel like we barely know each other and partly because I am a little afraid of the parents. That's totally honest. So when I got this I was like WTF. Trevor said that I should just take it in stride and understand that it is a complement somehow... But that didn't sit well with me. Because if we were totally honest, it did hurt my feelings, even if it was just a little. So I had a conversation with the girl who sent it to me... A " I just want to give you a little feed back on your valentine, it hurt my feelings a little bit. I'm not sure you meant to do that but it did come out that way" kind of conversation. Thinking we would move on from there the end of school came and I was ready to have my "single girl at home" valentines when the phone rang. It was the girl's mother. She wanted to talk about the whole valentine issue because it appeared as though the girl had not shared the whole story of what was on the valentine so she was up in arms. When informed it appeared as though this would be an unintentional teaching moment for this girl. I guess the girl was afraid of repercussions despite my saying that I just wanted to give her feed back and that was all. She felt so awful that she wanted to write me a new valentine which I was surprised at..... End Part One

Part Two: is that the next day, the girl seemed a little tentative of me. I was trying to wipe the slate and move past the whole thing but it seemed she wasn't quite ready. Knowing she was going to give me the apology valentine without pushing it I was, I must admit, a little apprehensive and ready for it! Finally after snack recess I was handed a scroll like letter with a red ribbon tied around it. I waited to read it, respecting her need for it to be a moment between us. When I read the letter I was actually a little impressed and still kind of confused. The letter read: "Ms. Emille Im sorry the valentine i gave you was so negative. sometimes im in deep thought and end up writing things i dont mean to. I meant to say strict (as in firm) and still fun and nice. i was very confused when you said wyou were offended (because i thought i had said firm and still fun and nice) and told my mom what had happened and she called mr. trevor, he told my mom i had wrote strict and mean. right now or any other time ive upset someone i go home and hid in a corner crying, because my goal is the EXACT opposite of what i sent to you. im really sorry about what came out in my writing and hope that your velntines day is still the way you expected and that it wasn't a bit worse after reading the negative and mistaken note i gave you. signed by the girl with a heart"

Part three: Today(Thursday) was GREAT.... It was like we had completely moved past the issue, and in fact had formed a deeper bond... So I'm seeing the whole thing as an awesome success and recognizing that sometimes being totally honest/ transparent with the kids is the best thing... It feels totally scary and terrifying but it's SO worth it because in this case, the girl now knows that I am in her corner. So alls well that ends well in love and war and teaching ;-)

Hi hi hi

I know, I've been awful again. To catch you up life has been crazy and fun! Thursday was stressful because we had our papers due and blah blah blah... On friday I had another observation which was good and really fun. We kicked off our non-fiction writing unit by reading about sea creatures in the morning then in the afternoon the kids did more research on an animal they are interested in. It was really fun to see what the kids were interested in and the ones who struggled to find balance. Today the kids were all jazzed up about valentine's day... I obviously am not haha.... I mean, who knows... It's another day... A little but of affection from the kids... I'll let you know how it goes...

Ouch.

So today, after an awesome meeting with Trevor where I left feeling with it and excited about our upcoming activities I applied for my first job. I felt so excited about it and really looking forward to hearing from these people. This school gave me the tingles, gave me good juju and made me want to just jump for joy. But life being life, the match was not made in educational heaven as I had hoped. Rejection. Let's just say it sucked. A little part of me felt heartbroken... ok let me be honest... a pretty big part of me felt that way. This is where having a strong family background and source of strength behind me really came in handy. I let myself feel the sad and acknowledge that this was a blow. But like all the times I have been rejected by high schools, colleges and whatever else I picked myself back up and got my giggles back on. This is just a little stumble on the train of life and I have every intention of continuing forward at full speed. The fact of the matter is that I'm 23, motivated and set on what I want my life to be, and I'm ready to start now. Those are both strengths and weaknesses and I intend on using them to my advantage every chance I get. Bring it on world... I'm ready for ya



PS song of the week: again, the lovely Adele "Turning Tables".... Adele... amazing...

Next time I'll be braver, I'll be my own savior...
I won't let you close enough to hurt me, no I won't ask you, just to desert me....

Did I mention I didn't have work yesterday?

Yeahhhhh that happened... Not long after I wrote on thursday DPS (Denver Public Schools) posted that they closed schools for friday in anticipation of the incoming "snopacolypse". Let me tell you how it all went down. Emily, fellow intern and twin, texts : "we don't have school tomorrow!" I respond "What??" I quickly look at the DPS website where an article was posted saying school was canceled. I proceed to scream, my roommate Mariana, who also works in DPS also starts to scream. There was a little happy dancing and then suddenly, silence. We watched the snow falling out our porch window and thought, hmm, yes this is nice. See here's the reality: teachers love snow days too. And yes, I will admit I was a little sad about the fact that the aquarium was post-poned but here's the best part. I got a 3 day weekend AND get to go to the aquarium still since we just have to reschedule it! WOOT WOOT.... So I spent yesterday doing all the sluggish stuff I usually do on saturdays aka de-compress life time and woke up today to be my usual sunday productive self. I have officially finished my first job application and plan to apply on monday morning... It's terrifying but also so cool knowing that I'm sending myself out into the real world and now, its just time to keep fingers crossed!! Send me luckkkkkkkkkkk xoxoxoxo

I'm a little scared...

I'll be honest, as the impending future looms I begin to wonder if I really will be able to implement all the things I've learned in these past months. I mean don't get me wrong, practicing things everyday helps, but I wonder when I'm alone if I'll be able to keep it up. I feel like I need another intern year in order to really have it all down. I'm prepared but also scared... I guess part of what I will get is that when I'm in my own classroom I really will have it all together. In other news... SNOW SNOW SNOW.... I'm very torn because we have a field trip planned for the aquarium tomorrow. We're also expecting 10-22 inches of snow... Which do I want more... snow day or aquarium... UGH SO HARD I HAVE NO IDEAAAAA